It’s your first new year! woo! 2015 will be your first full calendar 365 days around the sun. This year you’ll learn to walk and talk. You’ll eat your first strawberry and go on your first hike. You’ll dance for the first time and maybe even sing for the first time. This year is going to be epic.
It’s hard now for me to imagine my life without you or imagine how I was ever not your mom. It’s hard for me to believe that this will be my first full year with you in my life. These last four months have been so filled with emotion and big moments that I can only imagine what 2015 will feel like. I know that this time next year you will be such a big girl, and I’m sure only traces of my little baby will be left.
I can’t believe I’m going to be back at work in a few short weeks, but I’m not going to think about it for now. I’m going to focus on enjoying every remaining moment of our time together, and I’m going to make sure not to blink this year so I don’t miss anything.
This week you started teething. It was literally like someone turned on a saliva faucet in your mouth. You’re not upset. You just chew on your hands a lot and use your tongue to rub along your bottom front gum line.
You are sitting up like it’s your job. You’re holding your neck up so confidently, and you’re even trying to pull yourself up all the time. It’s like you’re doing little crunches. You’re awake more, and you smile more, and you talk more than you did before.
You laughed for the first time this week. Shappy was telling us a story, and she is such a good storyteller. You were sitting up on my lap and watching her enrapt and smiling as she talked. And then, out of nowhere, you laughed. It was the most magical sound I’ve ever heard. and then. . . you laughed again. A full head back giggle. I gasped and told Shappy that was the first time you’d ever laughed. And your Aunt Shappy was so overcome with joy and the moment that she started crying. It was amazing and hilarious and classic. It was my favorite. I’ll never forget it. Given that your Aunt Shappy has possibly made me laugh more than any other person I’ve ever known (except maybe for Gigi), it seems only fitting that she would make you laugh for the first time.
Someday remind me to tell you about how you spent new year’s eve snuggled up asleep in your Aunt Stacy’s closet. You were a champ until we had to put you back in your carseat to head home. You were tired and afraid and angry (and probably just confused to be awake so late), and I had to pull over, trade seats with your dad and get into the back seat to rock you for a few minutes. You calmed almost instantly, and then my sweet girl, you smiled the whole way home. It was like you suddenly realized, oh hey, it’s a new year. This is going to be good.
And it will be, my love.
You are so loved, my Beanshine. Always.