Welcome to the world!!! I think that’s one of the first things I said to you after you were born, Welcome, my love.
Oh, my sweet August. We are over the moon that you are here. You are amazing.
You joined us and made us a family of four one week ago on Saturday, June 18th at 9:18 pm. You weighed 7 lbs exactly and measured 20 inches long.
Here’s what I know about you so far: You are calm and oh so composed. // When you’re awake, you’re quite alert and soaking everything in. // You have strong legs, very strong. All the nurses commented on them. // You have gravitas. We can see it already. // You don’t cry much (knock on wood). Even when you wake up hungry, it’s almost like you wake up talking more than crying. //
You already smile and laugh in your sleep. // I think you look like your papa. You’ve got his eyes, his hair, his coloring, and his distinct jaw line. // You look so much like your sister in some ways and then not at all like her. // You’re the best. // You don’t like cold things (like wipes), but you seem to like hats. // You’re a great eater and sleeper. As of day 7, you’re now up to 7 pounds 6 ounces! Not only have you made up your birth weight, but you’re also gaining weight.
You have had a long week filled with lots of joy and a few scary moments.
Of the past 7 nights, you’ve spent 4 in the hospital. The first two as we recovered from your arrival, and the last two making sure you were ok. The last two days have been pretty scary. On Wednesday, you vomitted quite a bit of blood, so we had to take you to the ER. They were hopeful it wasn’t serious because all of your vitals were strong, so we spent a few hours there and then were able to go home. Then yesterday you had blood in two of your stools, so they asked us to come back in so that they could do labs and monitor you to make sure it wasn’t anything serious. I will spare you the details in this letter, but suffice to say that the blood drawing in the ER was traumatic. It may have been the worst few hours of my life to date. Seeing you in pain was excruciating.
I did the best I could to stay calm and to keep you calm despite the pain and shock you must have felt, but it was a rough few hours. Although all of your labs came back normal, they wanted to monitor you overnight to make sure you didn’t have any other signs or symptoms of anything more serious.
We’re snuggled safe at home now, but I can’t help crying as I write this. You’re such a calm and easy baby, and so it made it even more difficult to see you in such pain and to feel so helpless. I am trying to focus on the happy fact that we were able to rule out so many more serious concerns.
In the past 24 hours you have been symptom free, so we are hopeful that our hospital visits are behind us!
Onto happier topics. . .
This is your sister, Beatrice. She is so happy that you have arrived. She loves you SO much already. She thinks you are her baby. She loves to hug you and to kiss you and to be near you. She really likes to hold your feet. She cries when she has to leave you or we take you into another room.
Here’s a video of your first meeting:
You should know that you already have many names in this family:
We called you Pancho (short for Francisco) while were you grew in my belly, so sometimes you’re still our Pancho.
We picked your middle name first–Van, because it was your grandfather’s middle name (may he rest in peace). He was a great man, and we wanted to honor him and for you to carry him with you always. You also have his (and Papa’s) feet. 🙂
Your father chose your first name,August. We searched for your first name for what felt like my entire pregnancy. He assured me all along that we would both just know when we found the right name, and sure enough, a few days before I was full term (37 weeks) your papa suggested August and we both just knew you would be August.
And lastly, your nickname, Ace. Nicknames are very important to me. Ace was on our list of first names all along, but we knew it wasn’t quite right as a first name. As soon as we decided on August, I really wanted to call you Ace instead of Gus or Auggie. My gramps always liked the name Ace, and we’re a card loving, card playing family. Ace seemed like the perfect nickname for August for our crazy fam.
Your papa adores you, sweet Ace. So many times since you were born, he has looked at me in awe of you and said I love him so much or he’s amazing. We are in awe of you.
In some ways your arrival has been so much easier than your sister’s. We knew better what to expect logistically, and we were better prepared so it was less of an adjustment or a shock to bring a new little baby home with us. It’s been an easier physical recovery for me, and even with your health scare, we’re overall calmer and more together this time.
In other ways, with the recent health situation, it’s been so new. We’ve been on unstable, scary ground. We didn’t know quite how to act or what to do. We just tried to be there for you and to keep loving you and to keep hoping and praying that everything would be ok.
I wasn’t quite prepared for how magical and wondrous it would be to meet you and to watch you grow over the past few days. Deep in my soul, it is such an honor and a true, sweet joy to have you here with us. When your sister arrived, becoming a mom changed me. Becoming your mom has most definitely changed me again. It’s new and different and in other ways the same, this becoming-a-mom-love. It has reminded me that this world is so much bigger than me, us. That we are just passing by and the best, greatest thing we can do is love each other with our whole hearts. We love you with our whole hearts, my dear one. If that’s one piece of advice I can give you, embrace the world fully, always love with your whole heart (don’t hide any pieces of it away for safe keeping, they’re keeping for no one) and actively work not to be afraid–of failure, or change, of losing, or not getting what you hope for–those are all gifts disguised as disappointments; they’re chances to experience, to grow, and to learn to love better.
We are in awe of you, sweet August. You’re a very special little guy. You already make the most amazing faces. I am so excited that you’ve joined us, and we can’t wait to see how you change and grow and to support you along the way.
I wish the world for you, sweet August. My heart is overflowing with love for you. I am so grateful and so humbled to be your mom, and I will dedicate my life to loving you in a way that is big enough and bold enough to deserve the privilege. I’m not sure I know how to be your mom or a mom to a boy quite yet (or even if that’s different from being a mom to a girl? is it?), but I promise I will always be here for you. I will always love you and support you and doing anything and everything I can to help you along this life’s journey. I can’t wait for all the adventures we’re going to have as you grow. We didn’t even realize that we weren’t quite complete until you arrived, but now we can’t imagine this Nguyening family without you.
Welcome to the world, my son. We’re over the moon that you’re here.
You are so loved, my dear August, always.